What are Habits and How Do You Make Them?
True or false: it takes 21 days to make a new habit.
It’s actually not really true! It could be true – but it depends on how difficult the habit is – the harder it is for you, the more times you’ll need to repeat it. If you’re doing something multiple times a day, it will probably become a habit sooner than 21 days. There’s no magical number of days.
However, there are tried and true ways to make new habits! That’s what we’re diving into in today’s video:
P.S. Watch Part 1 here or read the post.
The Habit loop
The cue triggers a craving, which motivates a response, which provides a reward, which satisfies the craving and ultimately is associated with the cue. The four steps form a neurological feedback loop that allows you to create automatic habits.
This loop can happen in a split second, and it’s happening all the time. All of our habits are driven by the desire to solve a problem. Think about hearing the buzz of your phone – that’s the cue you got a text, you immediately crave wanting to know what it says, you respond by checking your phone, and your reward is that craving is satisfied. You associate grabbing your phone every time it buzzes.
The 4 Laws of behavior change:
- Make it obvious,
2 Make it attractive,
3. Make it easy,
4. Make it satisfying.
For example, if you want to create a system around working out: put out your clothes the night before, pick a workout you enjoy, make it easy so you don’t have to think about it, make it satisfying by tracking your progress.
To break a bad habit, reverse those. 1. Make it invisible, 2. Make it unattractive, 3. Make it hard, 4. Make it unsatisfying. This has been used to help people quit smoking and other highly addictive bad habits
2 Formulas:
- Make it obvious. Time and location.
- Make it specific. I will (behavior) at (time) in (location). I will do a nightly sweep to pick up and declutter at 9pm of our living room. I will wash the dishes immediately after the meal here in the kitchen.
- Habit stacking, stacking one habit onto one that’s established. After (current habit) I will (new habit.) When I bring in the mail, I will take it straight to the recycling bin to sort it, and then I’ll take each item to it’s home. Or, when we’re finished with a meal and take the dishes to the kitchen, I’ll load the dishwasher right then.
Habit Stacking Routine
Once you’ve mastered one, you can create a routine!
Ex. After I pour my coffee, I will meditate or pray for one minute. After that, I will write my to-do list for the day. After I write my list, I’ll do the first task.
Or, after I finish eating, I’ll put my plate directly into the dishwasher. After I load the dishwasher, I’ll wipe down the counters and clear them of any things that shouldn’t be there. After clearing the counters, I’ll set out my coffee mug for the morning.
I’ve been using this to create a habit of running. I haven’t run since the pandemic hit, so this month I decided to apply this.
So I made it specific – I will run one mile to the park and back in the evening right when Brian gets home from work. The cue is Brian calling me saying he’s on his way home. That’s when I change into my running gear. Then I feel a craving to go run, so when Brian gets home, right away I respond by going for the run, and then number 4 – making it satisfying, I can check off the box that I did it.
How Will You Apply This?
- Read your Bible more this year
- Improve your health
- Improve a relationship
- Keep on top of the laundry
- Do the dishes
- Declutter your house
- The possibilities are endless!
Let me know in the comments below, what’s a habit you’ll use this to create?
